Hey look Shia, this movie of ours rules when you shine a light on it.

Of course you know, Indiana Jones has made his lauded return to the silver screen this weekend, and it's been met with droves of mixed feelings from longtime fans and critics. Some have embraced it without a second thought, brash others have lashed venom at it, as if it were the new Jar Jar Binx.

My personal favorite line I heard was "Just goes to show you, the only good Indy movies are the ones with Nazis in them."

But this Nazi-less Indy movie, Indiana Jones & The Kingdom of the Crystal Skulls, is a good movie. Yes, it's true. Heck, it's even a good Indy movie. But coming off the heels of the pinnacle Indy movie nearly 20 years ago (1989's "The Last Crusade"), it's a bit harder to enjoy it as much as you really truly want to.

But fear not, movie-goers! I've compiled a set of guidelines to bear in mind while sitting through the movie, whether you haven't seen it yet or already saw it but hated it. I'll do my best to keep this spoiler free, but read at your own risk if you don't want to know anything about the movie before seeing it. Just come back here for post-analysis after you do see it.

The must-have survival guide for INDIANA JONES & THE KINGDOM OF THE CRYSTAL SKULLS
*the most important thing to bear in mind is that the last Indy movie was "The Last Crusade." And I don't know what your definition of "last" is, but I would have taken it as a hint that Indy will no longer be marching off to war against evil forces who wish to harness biblical artifacts for their own evil doing. But that doesn't mean there aren't more ancient mysteries to be uncovered.

*crystal skulls are not something stupid that were created for this movie. They, in fact, have a long line of mystery and mythology and are considered one of the most mysterious archaeological subjects of the 20th century.

*this movie, like all other Indy movies, has been made by the same 2 guys who brought us Close Encounters of the 3rd Kind, E.T., and of course, Star Wars. The Indiana Jones franchise was created specifically as a way for both George Lucas and Steven Spielberg to 'have fun' with film making. It's a partnership inspired by James Bond, history and comic books. So when it comes to fun for this team, all bets are off, and all stunts are absolutely over the top. Don't expect this to be "The 10th Commandment" or "Schindler's List."

*This isn't your father's Indiana Jones. To be accurate with Harrison Ford's age, Indy has aged much by this movie. Thus, World War 2 is way over. We're now up to our waists in the Cold War, and it's a whole new era for the world, and the grey-haired Indy. It's the beginning of the future; the information age, where knowledge gives greater leverage and power than force does. So with different stakes and different prizes worth digging up, expect the payoff to be a bit different than the previous era of Indy films.

*Indy is an archaeologist and a high-end college professor of history. He has always followed the compass of truth, not "bedtime stories," not "myths," not "legends," not anything outside the ring of common sense. He has to see it to believe it. But he loves an adventure and has unearthed many unbelievable things through his travels. At this point in the Indy franchise, there is little he hasn't found, so this movie's treasure shouldn't shock you if it's out of this world.

*Mutt Williams is not Jar Jar Binx bad. In fact it's probably the young Shia Laboeuf's most tolerable role to date. But I do have trouble seeing him take over the franchise.

*Since you can do more with action movies now than you could in 1989, it should come as no surprise that Spielberg and Lucas will obnoxiously flex some serious muscle with action sequences in their 'fun' franchise. Lots of it will be awesomely uncalled for, but awesome for the very same reason.

*While the movie is a bit of a departure from what fans have come to expect from a good Indiana Jones movie, there are many comforting ties to the previous films.

*And hey, just for fun, did you know that Tom Selleck was originally cast as Indy? Talk about bad 'what-ifs" Try picturing this movie with Magnum PI, instead of Han Solo.